The False Dichotomy Of Trick Or Treat

oldschool-halloween

There was a knock on the door, followed by children in disguise.

‘Trick or treat!’ said the children.

‘I refuse to submit to your false dichotomy,’ said the home owner. Or more likely the home renter.

‘What?’ said the children. ‘Why?’

‘Well, trick or treat isn’t a real choice, is it? Especially when one of the options is ‘trick.’ Which is to say nothing of the fact that while the treat option seems positive at first glance, the treat is for you, not for me, meaning that I’m actually choosing between theft or vandalism, or, to use your chosen vernacular, trick or trick. What you’ve presented me with is the illusion of a choice designed to deceive me into submitting to your will while thinking I’m picking what I want.’

‘We’re not interested in your veiled criticism of democracy, we just want chocolate,’ said the children.

The renter made a sound of bitterness in the shape of a laugh. ‘The joke’s on you! Ignoring important social issues in order to focus on your short term material gratification only compounds the insight of my biting satire!’

Then the children egged the house.

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